Wednesday, July 15, 2015
I can tell myself how wonderful it is that she's no longer in pain. I can tell myself how thankful I am for the knowledge that she is wildly happy to be with her ancestors. I can tell myself how wonderful it is that we are all sealed together for eternity.
But it doesn't stop the ache when my kids cry for her. At least I'm comforted by the fact that they have a lifetime of examples of a wonderful Nana to inspire them. Me too.
Monday, July 13, 2015
I'm filling out an application for a rental property in Houston right now, and some of the questions are... personal. My credit history I get, but my height and weight?
When we last met, my summer was roaring towards some sort of plan. The actual application of the plan has been a little messy. We had a contract on the house in Wisconsin and an idea of what house house we were going to buy in Texas. But then buyers couldn't get funding and that fell through, so the house is still on the market and the likelihood of finding one in Texas is kinda looking like mission impossible.
So that's up in the air. But I'm here in Colorado with my parents, trying to keep the kids from freaking out. They miss the home they knew and are scared about the new one. I can't blame them. I'm also trying to help them understand what hospice is and why Nana (husband's mom) is there, and that she won't be on earth for very long. Heck, I'm trying to understand that for myself.
There have been so many tender mercies along the way this summer - and all in all, there are adventures being had and happy memories being made. But I wonder what what I'll recall about this summer when I look back years from now. I hope I can still recall the good memories over all the big scary tornado-y winds.
Can I just vent for a second? My full time occupation is Worrier in Chief. I worry. Sometimes I wonder what it's like to have normal...