Friday, November 21, 2014

just in case

The next time you talk to someone who is worrying about something with their child and says they think it's their fault, even though it isn't and couldn't possibly be - don't tell them they're wrong.  Yes, they're wrong, but there is nothing that will take away the guilt that comes from the idea that you could have prevented something that makes life more difficult for your child.

Instead, just tell them all the things that are right in their life.  That's really the only thing that can save them from trying to put blame somewhere and being completely overwhelmed.  Help them remember all the glorious blessings they have that make the reality they live in livable.  I was reminded today that I have a few big problems to deal with as a mother, and a thousand blessings to help.

Don't minimize their trial, because it is theirs, and it's larger than you can possibly imagine - just agree, and then try to find the light for them.  Or just hug them.  Because life really is wonderful.


Jane said...

Sound advice.
I really hope I don't do that when talking to people.
I will try to remember you and your knowledge in the future. Feel free to smack me if I start saying anyone is wrong.

Cathie said...

That is a cute munchkin right there.

HEAR YE. I need to document the fact that I ran 3 miles and didn't feel like death.  So just to make sure it wasn't a fluke, I did...