Tuesday, September 28, 2010

mean girls

Every now and then I get out of the habit of updating.  Things happen in my life that just shouldn’t be blogged about - not bad things, but there’s plenty of things that don’t need to be aired out on the intrawebs.

I do have one question I’ve been mulling around in my head lately.  If another child is physically violent with my kid, I get that I should teach them to defend themselves.  I’m not thrilled about that, but I do understand the thought behind it.  No worries at the present, no one is hurting my WonderGirl.

But what about mean girls?  Studies have shown that the “Queen Bee” syndrome starts in girls as young as 2 1/2 and 3 years old.  Every now and then I witness cliques forming and nasty little things being said my girl’s way.  I don’t know where kids learn the joy of excluding others to make themselves feel better, but they do.  Is there a class for this??  I never figured it out.  Now, my WG is a total spaz, and I’m not saying she’s a saint, but she doesn’t know what to say when someone is mean to her.  I don’t know how to tell her to defend herself, because mean girls always have a nastier thing to say and engaging them can really hurt.  In a battle of mean, my kid is pretty much unarmed.  And asking to be included has… uncomfortable results.

But I’ve been hurt by mean girls, age 2 to the present.  I know how awful it feels to be excluded, or have someone point out what a total loser you are.  And my heart breaks to think that my sunshine is going to have to go through it too.

But what’s a nice girl to do?

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