Thursday, July 3, 2014

inspired by my newsfeed this morning

My grandfather had a poem written up somewhere, and I memorized it.  Probably incorrectly, but this was the jist that my brain held onto:

I have often thought that I could be better
if I was a bold and brisk go-getter,
instead of a slinking placid sheep
with an unscrupulous urge to oversleep.
But the world needs fellows like me, I'll bet
else who would the go-getters go and get?

It's like someone wrote it for me, right?  Anyway, it fits with my daily WHAT THE HUH?? today.

Who are the people who feel the need to go up to a waiter/ manager and complain that someone else is breastfeeding?  I mean, who ARE they?  And as you should all be aware, I am NOT a breastfeeding advocate.  It was one of the worst things I've ever survived (and no, it wasn't because it hurt - it was that fun disorder it gives me) and when lactivists come my way, I run the opposite direction.  When I hear all the data about how I'm doing horrible things to my kids by giving them formula, I show them my kid's test scores from school and their clean bills of health.  Breastfeeding is great, but the alternative isn't the demon it is made out to be.

(that's the harshest I'll ever rant about it.  if you can call that a rant.)

But if they want to do it, it's not a big deal.  If I see someone do it, I just think about how hard it is to mother no matter what our choices.  Even if they aren't doing the best job of covering up, I just look a different way.  Partly because when I did it, it was before all those awesome hooter-hiders came out and covering a nursing baby who is clawing at the blanket you are trying to keep that cover on WHILE fighting a mad suicidal monster inside of you is AWFUL.  More power to anyone who can manage to do it.

But really, who has the energy to go up to someone and complain about it and insist they stop? Who are these people?  I mean it - I'm not demonizing the people who get offended either.  We are all children of our Father in Heaven and I try not to demonize any of us because we all have our own invisible baggage we are carrying.  But with all that internal juggling, who has the time to go pointing fingers at anyone else?  Maybe they could teach me something about time-management.  Maybe if I organized my schedule better, I'd have more time to set aside for judging others.

And that goes for people who have the time/energy to complain to flight attendants/employees about other people.  I have limited time on this earth.  I'm not going to spend it demanding other people not go about annoying me.  (heaven knows there are enough things people could complain about ME - I'm trying to keep my glass house in one piece).

But then I think of that poem - and there ARE times when someone should stand up about things.  Things that are dangerous, hateful, whatever.  The world has been made a better place by people better than me who don't make a habit of minding their own beeswax.  It has its place, it really does.  The world needs whistle-blowers, abolitionists, suffragettes, etc.

So I guess what I'm saying is I'm glad there are people out there who aren't like me.

But take it down a notch, people.  There are worse things than someone breastfeeding in a Starbux.


Cathie said...

A) awesome poem
2) a study of siblings where one was breastfed and one was formula feed showed no significant difference
D) I think what bothers me most is that breasts have become so sexualized that to see them in their natural use is now considered "disgusting." I once read someone define modesty as "would you feel comfortable wearing it in front of the Savior." Using that definition, I don't feel immodest nursing - - even though I free boob it. I don't think the Lord would ask a child to eat under a blanket.

Jane said...

Once again Cathie beats me to the salient point. There are breasts EVERYwhere these days. Falling out all over billboards and on TV. What's the big deal?
Also, the kid covers up most of it because he/she is so happy to be eating - mostly - so relaaaaax, people with the problems.
I think it's the reason for standing up that matters. Do we take a stand for selfish reasons or because someone else is suffering. I've always been a fan of the 'why' of things.
Also, things like this are why I hate the media.

Anonymous said...

Brilliantly word-smithed blog…and excellent comments. You attract the best to your blog.
Back in the day, breast-feeding pioneers would throw a blanket over the shoulder-covering-front-parts in church, serve up lunch to the wee ones and none were the wiser. But then we also wore much less revealing moo-moos, while todays pregos let it all hang out in skin tight jersey knits. Maybe the issue isn't so much about hooter etiquette , but some kind of push back to a growing movement of abrasive, in-your-face social/moral value changes that are hitting society like wrecking balls? Common sense gets lost in the tussle.

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