Thursday, February 5, 2015

constant craving....

Women always worry about turning into their mothers when they get older.  Me?  I worry about turning into Mad-Eye Moody.

Or Barty Crouch Jr. on polyjuice potion pretending to be Mad-Eye.  Whatever.

Ahem.  NERDS RULE.  Ahem.

Seriously - Thing 3 is turning my hair grey.  I actually have a grey hair and even though that may actually be from being 35, I blame it squarely on him.  He is TERRIFYING.  You turn your head for one second and he's cheerfully playing with knives on the counter.  YES THAT HAPPENED.  He's in the bathroom, putting his sibling's toothbrushes in the toilet.  He's eating glue sticks.  My deodorant.  Carrying a massive jug of olive oil around the house.  Drawing on my walls even though we have hidden all the pencils.  HE FINDS THEM.  Stealing his dad's work iPhone even though I keep telling the husband to stop plugging it in on his bedside table because Thing 3 knows it's there.  Ripping up library books.  Steals my contacts case and tries to eat it EVERY DAY. Fishing pancakes out of the trash and rubbing them into the carpet. Stealing EVERY CUP IN THE HOUSE.  Then pouring the water EVERYWHERE.  He's a crazed cup thief - I'm his nursery leader, so I know.  He has a cup in front of him and he goes for everyone else's every single time. Then throwing up somewhere random.  JUST BECAUSE.

These all happen.  Daily.  And that's not even a tenth of it all.  He's so flipping adorable that he's managed to stay alive, but I can't let my guard down.  The poor Dude is soooo over him, and I feel terrible about it, but you can hardly blame him.  How would you feel if a rabid 1 year old spent most of his awake time trying to attack you or destroy everything you hold dear?


Were my other kids this scary?  I was in a PPD haze for most of WonderGirl's first few years and a good portion of the Dude's, so I don't trust my memory.  Do you guys remember?

I took this picture a few days ago and I have no idea why he did this, but he kind of looks like he's attempting a Mad-Eye look.  He's not, by-the-by.  I have strict non-disclosure policies about Harry Potter in these parts.

No spoilers.  When he reads Harry Potter, it'll be fresh.  I made WG watch all the movies in hiding when she was reading HP last summer.  He's a flipping sponge.

But seriously, guys.  CONSTANT. VIGILANCE.


Jane said...

Your husband is pretty handy. Could he build a cage - I mean play area - from 2x4s and some chicken wire, or chain link, whatever in the back yard/basement?

Anonymous said...

Hmmm. Healthy is good. Sick is better.

HEAR YE. I need to document the fact that I ran 3 miles and didn't feel like death.  So just to make sure it wasn't a fluke, I did...