So every night/morning, I’m up for those pesky feedings and diaper changes every other hour or so.   And in between those times, I’m laying in bed, cursing my brain for not turning off so I can get some sleep.  I don’t think there’s anything positive a brain can think at 3am.  I can’t do it, I just lay there, furious, thinking every possible horrible thing about myself.  I’m sure it’s doing wonders for my blood pressure. 

But last night wasn’t as bad.  I was thinking over these amazing pictures from Erika’s 10th wedding anniversary Trash The Dress photo session, and thinking how awesome it would be to try it in another 5 years.  But oh, I thought, my dress was far too formal to do that.. grrr, grumble grumble… wait!  What about just the skirt, and some t-shirt that says something witty, like “My Dad Went To Dallas And All I Got Was This T-Shirt,” maybe “Vote For Pedro” (a staple of 2005, ahhhh).  Or something classy, whatever.  How fun would that be?!  And how awesome would it be if I could fit in that thing in another 5 years?!

I loved the skirt of my wedding dress.  All these gathers and tucks with white roses inside for the temple ceremony, and then red ones added for the reception.

Oh, I felt like a princess in that skirt, it was heavenly!  And all my bridesmaids, friends and family had hidden charms in the tucks that they didn’t reveal to me until after the ceremony - they all had these personal meanings from our relationships, and then they all put them on a necklace for me.  So.  Dang. Cute.  I’d love to get to slip that puppy on again, just for the memory of how divine it felt to feel the layers swish around my ankles as I danced.

I lay there smiling for the first time at 4am in days, thinking how fun that would be.  But then I remembered my groom isn’t the kind of guy who would be willing to do that with me.  That’s a side of my personality - the Ethel Merman part - he usually outsources to my friends, which has worked for him.  He also said I can’t pull off pink hair.  And that thought made me get cranky again (remember, 4am and all)… until I came up with the perfect solution. 

Stunt double.

I’d settle for Rowan Atkinson. *geek swoon*  Anyone have his phone number?!?!

And with that thought, I drifted off to sleep only to be woken up again half an hour later.  Grrrrr.