Monday, February 6, 2012

may i please have a clue?


The Dude. I just don't know what to do about him.  It REALLY doesn't help that my previous experience with a toddler was WonderGirl who had the verbal level of a 10 year old by this point.  I go back in my brain - desperately trying to remember what I did with her to get that - but I'm coming up with nothing.  It's so frustrating to have this brainy kid that I had almost nothing to do with her rocket speed development, and then a wonderful sweet boy who ambles along at comfortable speed and learns things whenever it happens to be convenient.  WHAT DO I DO WITH THAT??

Really, and then there's the sensory component - which is so slight it's almost even more frustrating.  He thrives on activity and play - he's not hyper sensitive about anything so he just lives life as a joyful linebacker.  So when he throws a 2 year old tantrum, it really makes him feel better to destroy everything around him.  But when you try to explain it to others, it sounds like I'm talking voodoo, trying to make up a reason for why my son is just a naughty, rough boy.  Which honestly, it feels like it sometimes.  Because the opposite side of the spectrum is that he is so cuddly and playful the rest of the time, it seems like I just have a wild child I can't control - since of course, I can't because HELLO, have you tried to live with a 2 year old?  Not those cute shy ones who sit on their parent's laps at story time, but the psychotic ones who are desperately trying to get OUT of your vice grip so they can steal the book from the librarian.  And for the record, WG was just as bad, except then she'd try to either read the book to the group (at 2, people) OR escape with the book and flush it down the toilet.  Yeah, that happened.


By the way, do YOU have one of those cute shy 2 year olds that sits in your lap for library story time??  Enjoy it, please.  You have it good.  GOOD, I tell you.

I tell myself it's okay, because WG was nuts and now she's this overachieving sweetheart.  Mostly.  Who absorbs information like a crack addict absorbs crack.  Or whatever crack addicts do.  Did you know a group of jellyfish is called a smack?  I do, now.  Also, she can name a country of the world for every letter in the alphabet, except for W and X since there aren't any.  Husband and I couldn't find one for O and she did - Oman, of course.  Silly parents.

But he's so different, I don't know how things will turn out.  His entire purpose in life is to acquire cookies.  All day every day, "MayIpleasehavecookie?"  And if you give him one - even a healthy one - he has to have more.  And more.  And MORE.  He's so obsessive about things that if he actually gets something good - like juice, I have to detox him because for the next 2 weeks he'll be running around the house like a junkie begging for juice overandoverandoverandover.  It's kind of scary, except when I'm laughing because it's nicer than crying.  He's going to be addicted to something - I don't know what.  Maybe I should just give in with the cookies and later he'll just ignore the marijuanas and cranks and such.


It'll be okay, right?  I have more to say, but right now he's sitting on my head giggling and yelling, "MAYIPLEASEHAVETICKLE?!?!?!"  So I gotta do that.

5 comments:

M said...

Robert is the same way. So frustrating, but I just can't stay mad at him. The tantrums, though . . . Oh, they are killer. Neither of my other two ever did that, the whole throw-yourself-flat-out-on-the-floor-kicking-and-screaming thing. And his addiction is gummies. "IwantgummiesPLEEEEEASE." Like you, with Rob I just don't know what hit me.

Kate G said...

Oh gosh. My now-5yr old boy (who definitely has problems dealing with his anger but has settled down CONSIDERABLY) used to rip the curtain rods from the walls, empty his dresser drawers, etc. if I sent him for an unsupervised time-out. Some kids--and I think often boys--are just super physical with their emotions. I feel your pain.
Thankfully, his little brother is the sit-in-your-lap at the library type so I still have some of my hair left.

Phat Fiddle said...

I can attest to Dude's linebacker hardiness. I saw him tumble out a crib and land head first onto the base of a large wooden dresser. I thought for sure he had cracked his skull or at least badly maimed himself, but no, he sniffled for all of 5 seconds and got right back up again. The Dude is indestructible. He's got some He-Man genes. The next Samson perhaps?

Jane said...

Let him learn his way. You and Tarzan sure didn't learn the same way if your mother is to be believed and you both turned out awesome.
As for the addictions, turn him on to carrots and celery. MayIpleasehavecarrot? is good for the eyes too. And both his parents wear glasses...

jennaroo said...

I feel for you. Today on Logan's chart from school it said that instead of playing BINGO with the speech therapist and other kids, he decided to rip the cards. If you find the answers, please share.

HEAR YE. I need to document the fact that I ran 3 miles and didn't feel like death.  So just to make sure it wasn't a fluke, I did...