what YOU doin'?


The Dude has not taken to big-brotherhood gracefully, but I do not give up easily.  So when I caught them playing on Sunday - together - I freaked out.  Little victories.  I take 'em.

On kind of the same topic (not really, but kind of in my head it works) - have you ever been really disliked?  As a grown up, I mean - not as a kid (that's too easy).  And you ran in the same circles?  I have.  I actually don't blame them - if anything I'm always amazed at the caliber of people who are willing to love me.  There are more than enough reasons not to and they are willing to look past my obvious flaws - amazed every time.

It hurts, right?  You make yourself scarce around them and try to be as invisible as possible, and it puts a knot  in your stomach every time.  I'm not perfect at it, but I manage okay when I find myself in that place.  Now here's the question - what if there is someone YOU can't abide?  And you know how crummy it feels to be excluded and frozen out - and can't stand the idea of doing that to someone else?  Just curious - how do you manage your feelings in a situation like that?  I don't want to make anyone have a knot in their stomach because of me.  Fake it till you make it seems to work.  But what if you are having trouble doing that?  I remind myself that people are children of our Father in Heaven and he loves each of us - and it's my job to do the same.  That works most of the time but there are some people who blindside me and I get worn down.  Anywho, what do YOU do?

Also - I'm not talking about YOU.  I love you!!

Comments

Anonymous said…
WWJD….I think to myself that there is something in that person that H.F sees & loves, and I don't. What is it? I don't give too much attention to it; just enough to solve the puzzle…and move on. "Difficulties are meant to make us better, not bitter." Oscar Wilde…and he was no saint.
Anonymous said…
There is beauty all around, when there's love at home.
Cathie said…
And um, what if that person is related to your spouse? That's my problem. :-/
Jane said…
We live a totally different life in a totally different atmosphere from you, so I can't say if anything relates but, I just stay so blasted busy there is never time for more than 15 seconds with any one person in any scenario. Also, I don't have many friends who aren't family, and we don't go places that aren't church (see above), so there you are.
Talula Hula said…
Do unto others. But also keep very good boundaries.
Mary said…
Listen, pretty girl, you are mean to yourself. Stop that! You would never say about a friend what you said about yourself in this post. Be your own friend, sister! Self-compassion is the bomb.
Elizabeth said…
You are awesome. I've always liked you. Even when I first discovered some of your quirky ways. You were cool and I wanted to be your friend.

That being said, I have a lovely handful of people I despise. Including the jerkface ex-fiance. There are others, going all the way back to teenagerhood.

It takes a LOT for me to truly despise someone, though. I have a friend who unfriended me, we reconnected and then unfriended me again. Though I could probably never become good friends with this person again for turning their back on me, I probably would still be civil and ok with that person if they would change their mind about me. They do despise me. It was the weirdest thing. They just...disappeared. I read a book a couple of years ago that helped me realize I wasn't the only one: What did I do Wrong by Liz Pryor. It's an interesting read, if you get the chance or inclination.

Popular Posts