But eventually there were SO many things that it became a little ridiculous and the rants in my head became more and more dark. So I'm going to let those deeper, more detailed rants float off into the land of forgotten thoughts, and instead, clear my soul with a random list of Things I Hate, inspired by today.
I hate gloves. Boots. Snow pants. Hats. Shoes. Socks. Scarves. And being responsible for humans who are supposed to be responsible for having all these things on their persons by 7:30am.
I hate the doctor I always get when I need an appointment ASAP. There's a reason she's always available. Every blasted time she explains in great detail what's going on, and then tells me to wait-and-see. I DID wait-and-see and it didn't get better so that's why I paid a copay to see you and get the right drugs to make my face stop itching. BLARGGG.
I hate going to the pharmacy to pick up said drugs you had to beg for. We're not hurting financially at all, but it feels like everything goes towards maintaining my body and fixing stuff I broke. Like the garage door I rammed into. The only key fob to the van that I lost. The growing number of pills I take to ensure I can stay a functioning member of society. If I wasn't such a loose cannon, we could have gone to Fiji several times, or at least used the savings to buy our own island.
I hate taking my adorable toddler ANYWHERE. He was in rare form at the doctor's office. He screamed so loudly while I was wrestling him at the check-in counter, all the receptionists gave me hairy eyeballs. They may have said something too, but thankfully he had rendered me temporarily deaf.
I HATE VOMIT.
I hate irony. After carpet cleaning on multiple floors and a lengthy bath to clean up the vomit-y toddler, I took exactly 5 seconds too long to chase after the nekid toddler, who was so blasted happy to be running around nekid and free. I just paused... it was so nice to see happiness. And juuuuuust as I grabbed him to get him dressed, he peed in the doorway of my bedroom. Carpet cleaning take 2.
I hate living with a mind that is constantly full of angry static. Mental illness is very time consuming. I refuse to give in, but it's dang exhausting, like walking through rubber cement.
I hate that sometimes my life feels like brief interludes between doctor's appointments.
I do NOT hate having a husband who is so in tune with you, he brings home dinner and chocolates, and most importantly, a smile.
I do not hate blogging, so that's nice. It makes November quite tolerable.
Now, a few pictures to remind me that life is still good.
I handed him a bowl with dry cereal this morning, and he took it without saying a word - walked to the utensil drawer and reached up blindly until he felt a spoon, took both to the table, climbed up into a chair, then looked up at me pleased as punch and said "Thank you!" For a kid that doesn't know my name, that's pretty freaking adorable.
I was cleaning out the cupboards today and it turns out I have more fondue forks than I have shoes. That's saying something. It's saying I NEEDS A PARTY, YO.