Wednesday, July 30, 2008

Just in case you are living under a rock and haven’t checked out this fake-blog, enjoy.

Note: It’s a fake blog mocking the deluge of young LDS couples and gals blogging and being.. well…fake.  So you you aren’t LDS, and have never known any Utards, this won’t make a lick of sense.  Check out the About  Me on the right to figure out what TAMN means.

Up. Date.

1. Putting on my own music camp is not as excruciating as it seemed.  I’m just completely exhausted - but really proud that I’m so good at it.

2. So.  So tired.

3.  I have a rule about blog posting - I never write anything about SH and my … marital activities.  I figure it’s best to keep that stuff hush hush, what with it being the mature thing to do.  Plus he’d kill me.  But when he announces to our house guests that they have to leave because he wants to get *lucky*, how do I NOT blog that??  Such a conundrum.

4. This one is for the dear woman who birthed me - my list of retractions.

  • Music camp was not a horror as a child, it was that I know putting it ON was a logistical and energy-draining mammoth of an undertaking.  That is why I consider myself completely batty.

  • Sabrina, you and your kids were not only used for birth control - the real reason she gave up her own time with me to have me visit you on trips home was because she wanted me to continue to cultivate such a fabulous relationship.

  • I am not stupid.

  • I am not hideous, fat and my nose is not as large as previously reported.

5. Congrats to my parents on their 36th year of makin’ it work, matrimonial style.  Thank you for the example, the incredible sacrifices you made to give us such fabulous experiences and educations, and for following the gospel.  We won the parent lottery, we did.

Monday, July 28, 2008

I'm not very smart.

Also, I enjoy being in pain.  Apparently.  As a child, there was this horror we all dreaded - MUSIC CAMP.  Practicing, 74 other people practicing in the same room as you (okay, maybe 6, but it was LOUD) and it was obviously really, really tough to put on. 

So - WHY did I mention to my student’s parents - hey, why don’t I put on a music camp? WHY DO I DO THINGS LIKE THIS TO MYSELF?  It’s not necessary.  And yet, I looove biting off so much more than my poor mouth (or digestive system) can take.

Don’t get me wrong - the kids are awesome and it it’s pretty fun, but finding people to watch WonderToddler every day is super, super tough.  I just have this way of making my life more complicated.  Also, I have to wear a shirt all day now.

ALL DAY people.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

(via garfieldminusgarfield)

Okay, I need to comment in my comments and memory-swap on y’alls blogs and I will, but can I first say, how AWESOME you all are??  And I take personal responsibility for at least 5 of your starting your own blogs which I adore.  And Sabrina and Maria are SOOO next.

By the way - I just had a funny memory - Sabrina, do you know the reason why I visited you every summer and Christmas that I was home from college?  Yeessss, it was because I loved you and missed you, but also - my mom forced me to make time to visit you so I would spend time with your kids to remind me that I didn’t want any anytime soon.  Yup, you were my birth control:) Not that you don’t have adorable kids!  I just needed to be reminded that those kids were the direct result of… well, you know.  So thanks!  And now, you are my mom guru, so it totally balances out!

heh. Loving the memories thing!  Thanks everyone!!

Monday, July 21, 2008

Yes, I'm a leming.

I know everyone else is doing this, but pshhhhaw, I’m doing it anyway.  It’s my blog and I’ll be self-absorbed if I want to …

1. Add a comment on my blog, leave one memory that you and I had together. It doesn’t matter if you knew me a little or a lot, anything you remember!

2. Next, re-post these instructions on your blog and see how many people leave a memory about you. It’s actually pretty funny to see the responses. If you leave a memory about me, I’ll assume you’re playing the game and I’ll come to your blog and leave one about you.

Go forth and pontificate!

Friday, July 18, 2008

1. Buy a red v-neck tee.

2. Realize that this particular shade of red does you NO favors.

3. Rubberband it like a crazed hippie.

4. Put it in a simmering pot of color remover, add bleach.

5. Look super awesome.

You’d think it would have turned white… I mean COLOR REMOVER and bleach. And yet we got yellow. Hrm. I’m fine with that if you are.

Thursday, July 17, 2008



Wednesday, July 16, 2008

my obsession of the day.  I could so rock these.


Oh sweet friends, I didn’t mean I didn’t loves you!  I mean, I miss all of you.  I moved here after I’d had WonderToddler, and no one knows who I used to be.  I’m treated like the mom I’ve become. 

Like Dani - my flute-playing drama-bringing perpetually-commitment-phobic friend from my undergrad days. We had a nice chat today… phone of course…  and I feel like a different person. 

Look up the definition of extrovert - “Extroverts tend to ‘fade’ when alone.” I’m SO thankful for the internet - and the phone - but good golly I’m lonely for who I used to get to be.

I miss the friends who knew me before I turned into a mom.

(if this makes no sense - Lola - this might help)

ganked from carlovely:



YEEEAAAAHH- (via marsz)

I’ve been looking for this!

Snagged from excycle:

Pixdaus: Popular Today Pics - Segway Beta

 Today SH took our van in since the steering wheel actually shakes while you drive - the whole time.  Turns out it was so out of alignment, it wouldn’t even register on the machine that tells how outta whack it is.  Whew! I needs a Segway.   With a sidecar.  That fits a carseat. And tassels on the handlebars.

Monday, July 14, 2008

why I'm sleepy and annoyed today

I slept horribly last night.  I had this dream that every one I knew was making out with this one guy, but he wouldn’t smooch ME.  I was crazed all night, wanting some lip action, and wondering why in the world he wasn’t into me.  Why?  WHY??

Yes, THAT guy.  I woke irritated, and now I have a crush on Ben Linus from Lost.  Why wouldn’t he mack on me??  Why do I suddenly find this maniacal, lying jerkface completely adorable?!?  My head hurts.

fun quiz for myspace profile and blog

Hrm… how on is this? Lesse - I *am* a people whore and loves me some friends… yeah, you probably don’t want to mess with me, but mostly because I’ll confuse the crap outta you with my 1 estro-logic.  But “Sometimes sexy in a way that only their lover can understand”?  Is that like when I try getting SH in the mood by irrtating him, just because I’m bored?  Oh, and I also have no idea what “make love” is. I prefer “gettin’ it on”.

Now we ALL know more about me than we’d like!

1. estro-logic - the art of changing the definition to something only a female can understand. Mostly so I can confuse my opponents, so while they stand there befuddled, trying to figure out why any grown woman would insist that Rhode Island does not actually exist because the only persons I’ve ever known from there were the Griffin family on Family Guy, I can grab their last brownie and eat it before they realize it’s gone.  

Friday, July 11, 2008


Ever have something happen that is so completely horrible that you can’t even talk about it?  You procrastinate telling anyone about it or doing anything about it, but it sits in the back of your mind and stomach like a hot coal… with pointy spikes on it.

When we moved to Brasil, we bought a small external hard drive to put all our pictures on so they wouldn’t fill up our laptops.  Then, just kept putting our pictures on it. Baby pictures, family pictures, everything from our dating life and beyond.

Last week, after I loaded all of my pictures from the sibling reunion in LA, the hard drive made a horrible sound and froze.  Turns out, if we even try to start it up again, everything will be lost.  The only way to save the data is to send it off to a “clean room” and pray they can manually extract the files.  For a few hundred dollars.  Seven of them.

So there’s the *ouch - that price tag HURTS* - and the *I am seconds away from losing my first pictures of WT, our first house, our honeymoon, the people who saved my life in Brasil, my daughter and my grandmother together, WT’s first swimming lesson… everything…*

The hard drive is sitting in our fridge.  I’m sitting in my closet.  Holy CRAP this hurts.

Thursday, July 10, 2008

There’s nothing like hanging around with other people’s kids to make you realize you’re actually really, really good at being a mom.  It’s always a tad shocking, but nice. 

After that lovely revelation yesterday, I tried taking WT to her first movie this morning at the free summer shows at the local movie place.  She actually did very well - and after about a half hour of munching on some healthy snacks, she wrapped her little arms around my neck and giggled for about 10 minutes.

DANG, sometimes I rock at this.

Would you eat that??



Recipe Fail

Monday, July 7, 2008

After over 20 months schlepping around a diaper bag SexyHusband picked up at the army surplus store, I treated myself to my OWN kinda diaper bag today (notice the jazz hands, symbolizing the wild excitement here at Chez Igottanewdiaperbagwoohoo).

Every actual diaper bag I’ve found is either so plain and dull - or covered in winnie the pooh junk - OR, it’s one of those quilted things that I find so blasted uggo and can’t figure out how it’s suddenly in style to carry around a bag that looks like The Latest Diaper Bag For the Above 80 Crowd -

diaper bags for the above 80 crowd

And if you want a diaper bag that looks hip and not like… well, a diaper bag, you schell out at least 250 smackers to some guy who sounds like Helmet or Fucchi.

But not in my world.  Burlington Coat Factory, 20 smackeroonies.  Look out world, she’s got a new bag.

Searching last night, this was the first entry when I typed in my name.

Totally.  Awesome.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

Stop it, people!

Showed up to July 4th shindig yesterday, and a lady immmmmediately asked me if I was pregnant.  Because I wasn’t wearing a tight shirt.

Even if I was, you don’t ask that!! You just don’t!!!!

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

Then look what she taught daddy!

look what Yo Gabba Gabba taught her.

Hope It’s Not Something Kinky Backstory: I sent my dear, sweet Mumsi the link to and ever since she has been signing her emails “LOL Mom”. I wasn’t quite sure she understood what it meant, so I asked her… I got the LOL from that website about Moms’ emails - some of the Moms used it to sign off - it means Lots of Love of course, what else COULD it mean?? - hope it’s not something kinky as I don’t do kinky - have been racking my brain to think of something off-color that it could mean and just can’t come up with anything!! If LOL is off limits for signing off, I might adopt your xxoo - it’s a nice one - love is nice too but gets boring to just put “love” all the time - variety is good, right? So, bye for now … xxoo Mom

Hope It’s Not Something Kinky

Backstory: I sent my dear, sweet Mumsi the link to and ever since she has been signing her emails “LOL Mom”. I wasn’t quite sure she understood what it meant, so I asked her…

I got the LOL from that website about Moms’ emails - some of the Moms used it to sign off - it means Lots of Love of course, what else COULD it mean?? - hope it’s not something kinky as I don’t do kinky - have been racking my brain to think of something off-color that it could mean and just can’t come up with anything!!

If LOL is off limits for signing off, I might adopt your xxoo - it’s a nice one - love is nice too but gets boring to just put “love” all the time - variety is good, right? So, bye for now … xxoo Mom - not from my mom - but it sounds like it could have been;)

(via garfieldminusgarfield)

That one brick I’m missing? It’s kind of a good thing.  If I did have it, I’d use it to throw at someone today.  Such as….

  • The other people at the pool who looked at me with amusement as my WonderToddler threw a fit to end all fits tbat resulted in having to make a quick, very shrill exit.

  • My kitchen pantry for not having enough flour for me to make some blasted bread for dinner.  (no don’t worry, you aren’t in some parallel universe where I cook and stuff - it’s the bread machine.  And I’ll let robots do whatever the freak they want.)

  • My kitchen floor.  Just cuz.  It’s ugly and stuff.

  • Anyone who posts a wedding photo.  Ever.  No offense to you happy folks, but my wedding day was far from happy, and I don’t have a single decent picture from it.  Maybe because it was because was such a disaster from the day we decided to get married, but every time I see a beautiful bride or a happy couple, I die a litle inside because I wasn’t one, and I’ll never get the chance. (And ever since that day, I’ve been happy as a clam.  I loves me some married life, I just wish I’d gotten to have that one day I’d dreamed about.)

  • All the women on TV who are wearing underpants and nothing else.  Good golly, why do I have to see that?  Why do young girls have to see that?  Why can’t we just oogle womanhood and not some souless sexpot?

  • Hrm… and I’d probably actually throw the brick right at myself too.  What a grumpy mcgrumperson I am. It’s just that kind of day. Gag.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

post trip doldrums

Oh, I can’t even beging to describe how absolutely amazing and fantastic my week was.  Imagine it - everywhere I turned, someone who loved me and loved WonderToddler.  An entire week without that constant state of tension I live in, trying to meet WT’s needs, keep her at my side and ready to sprint when she runs away in public(and she’s fast, people!).  My brothers, sister(inlaw), Mom, aunts, uncles, cousins and one crotchety grandpa all fell in love with the WonderToddler I love, and stepped in to play, catch and distract while I got to have fun like I was a kid again, and BREATHE.

Picture it - a whole day with my siblings and cousins, just playing and having fun while my aunt and Mom gave WT the time of her life.  Minature golf full of my all my brothers creepy dancing (and one hole inone by me!). The beach with a whole crew of us - playing in the waves, playing in the sand, eating my uncle’s AMAZING grill skillz, and sitting around a raging fire toasting marshmallows.  Watching my little girl be happier than I’ve ever seen her as she bounded from my mom to my aunt, squealing their names and dancing at the very sight of them.  I can’t give the week justice, but the memories are so precious to me and I treasured every moment of joy and peace.

Today was different.  I spent the day alone with WT like I usually do, and most of the evening too since SH was off on some meetings.  I’m back on ready-to-sprint mode, and I miss my family so much I ache.  I’m so blasted lucky to have a family that I love so much.  But I spent WonderToddler’s naptime trying to find tickets back to see them.  Except for the killer awesome time I spend with my band, I mostly only interact with people who have kids for WT to play with or my students.  Good golly, I’m bored out of my mind!

PPPFFFFFTTTTT. Okay, enough complaining.  It’s only because I wish I could live that week over and over again and never stop - it was that good.  I’m such a lucky gal to have had at least one week like that.


Oh, and the BorderCollies, my faboo celtic band just got selected to be on the Georgia Council of the Arts touring roster thingy.  This is AWESOME people!  Gigs in random corners of this ecclectic state, and even the possibilty of some national shows!  Now I just have to find a flight case for my fiddle… that’s a problem I’m not sorry to have.  SUWEET!!!

Got in laaate last night.  SO MUCH BLASTED FUN!!!  Deets to follow!

HEAR YE. I need to document the fact that I ran 3 miles and didn't feel like death.  So just to make sure it wasn't a fluke, I did...